He thinks through textures and mumbles
An unattractive question my way.
Inquiry assumes me and just as unlovely
I butter the jagged crust of my elbows.
When we make love, do I cut you?
I skin his curiosities to spite myself
Because the girls I lived with were never made for winter.
There’s nothing springtime about the girl with thick skin.
And while I’ve been apologizing for my calloused heels,
He tasks intimacy to peel me bare-
I’ve seen men search for a pumpkin seed before.
I watched a boy turn maybe man and almost gentle
Despite the conjuring in papa’s silhouette,
Eat a peach, skin and all.
I learned to be pumpkin to fend off the teeth.
And that man praised me inedible-
Till he came along with his balms and appetite.
There’s a conversation to be had with women, or rather young ladies, in regard to defining femininity. It isn’t vulnerability, virtue or gentleness that define us or express our worth to others. So, when my fiance asked me “why are you so strong?”, it brought me to childhood. Hanging out with my brother’s and conditioning myself to be a woman who couldn’t be hurt by the men they became. My apprehensions over what I and society assumed femininity was in my youth made a deep impression in my relationships with people. Anyway, enjoy. Tell me what you think please.